Good Reads

What needs to change in our society?

Many people criticize mommy bloggers that we romanticise motherhood. After dirty diapers, saggy breasts and sexless nights, the only romance that is left in our lives is our make-believe world of blogging.

But today, I was jolted out of my rose-colored world. This is happening at an alarming frequency nowadays. A young, virile man finding an outlet to his sexual abundance by force in any nubile female he comes across. I am talking about the rape and molestation cases that have been growing day by day. Today, I read an article by Shenaz Treasurywala, who has poured her heart out in the open letter. It needs some nerves to admit to the world that you have been molested time and again. But I tell you what, she is not the only female to be groped. I have been groped, and I am sure you must have been too. Any girl who leaves the sanctity of her house to go to her school, college, work or leisure, is subjected to it. Holding a purse or a bag as a shield or crouching comes naturally to us in crowded places. So averting eyes when met with unshaven, unkempt street romeos.

Man are strong physically. The credit only goes to the Mother Nature. But what makes them stronger is the knowledge that they can get away with it. Girls are groped or molested in the open, but no one dares to raise a voice. Why? For the fear of backlash. Who wants to die just for saving a girl? Being a girl, she is bound to be molested if not today, then tomorrow. Who wants acid poured on their face? Not me, not you.

We have daughters at home. If we don’t save these girls today, who will save our daughters tomorrow? Writing letters to anybody won’t help us. People to whom we write letters do not understand this; the women of their houses do not travel by buses and local trains, they do not visit vegetable markets. And also tell me one thing, how holding silent candle light protests helps in creating awareness? It’s been two years since Nirbhaya case happened, what has changed since then? Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

Gandhian philosophy doesn’t work here. Then we were fighting against humans, now we are fighting against devils. Evil times demand stronger actions. Male castrations and public hangings.

What men do not understand is that women are weak only till they see themselves as weak. Once they realize their true strength, men do not have a match. I remember as a child, I had seen a movie where Rekha and her gang of rape survivors fish out rapists from their hiding holes and do unmentionables to them. The need of the hour is such a strong bond. A sorority where we stand for each other at all hours. Just a shout away.

I remember my frustrations on the curfew timing imposed by my parents. 00:15 on New Year’s Eve. Can you imagine wishing friends Happy New Year and then dashing off to home? And finding mummy pacing the length of the living room? She didn’t wish Happy New Year. Just gave one of her trademark hard stares. Those stares were worse than a full body scan. I can understand her fear now. Because I have the same fear for my daughter. I can only teach my daughter to be safe and leave everything to luck. But if all mothers can teach their sons to respect girls, millions of parents will not need to rely on luck and prayers every time their daughters step out of their houses.

May be the present is beyond redemption, but we can still save the FUTURE.

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  1. Having three sons, I totally agree with you. They are little still but we already talk about how girls should be treated. I feel an obligation to teach them to respect women. That’s my job. Society certainly won’t do it. Love this post.

    • Thanks so much Kristenlynn. If all parents take this on them to teach values to their children, we will be seeing less of such horrific things in our society. I sincerely hope to see that day. 🙂

  2. jagritjain

    If we had more people like you in this world, it would have been a better place surely. I didn’t know such mommies even existed on planet. Not in India.
    Best wishes.

    • Jagrit, there are many mommies like me in India. Indian women are waking up, but the sad part is that the menfolk still behave as if they are living in the Dark Ages. Thanks a lot for reading and supporting it.

  3. bizigal

    First Time Mommy I am sorry you have to live with this. It is a good thing your daughter has someone like you to help guide her.

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