What I learnt from my gynecologist that every mother of a daughter should know?

infections

Image: pixabay

A few days ago, my daughter suffered from a vaginal infection. It got cured in a few days, but the whole incident made me realize how my daughter is growing up, and in a few years will hit puberty. So when I visited my gynecologist for a routine check up, I made it a point to ask her a few things for my daughter as well. This is what I learnt from her…

  • Avoid using jet spray on the V-area of your daughter. When the water goes into the vagina, it can lead to vaginal infections. No doubt, vaginal infections have increased in girls today. In our time, a humble mug it was that kept us away from these nasty infections.
  • Do not use a perfumed soap to clean inside her intimate area. It destroys the good bacteria that helps prevent vaginal infections.
  • Keep the area dry; wipe it with a toilet tissue after urination instead of water.
  • After passing stool, clean the anus, and avoid touching the V-area with the same fingers.
  • Make her wear bloomers. With tight panties, the risk of E.coli transferring from her bottom to her vagina increases.
  • Disney print panties look cute, but better invest in a moisture-absorbing cotton panties that lets the area breathe and avoids bacteria or yeast infections.
  • Change her panties at least 2-3 times in a day.
  • School-going girls avoid using the school washrooms and tend to hold on. This can lead to urine infection. Urge her to use the washroom at least once in the school.
  • Girls are hitting puberty at an age as early as 9 years. Poor lifestyle, frequent consumption of junk and lack of physical activity are some of the prominent reasons. Let’s avoid this if possible.
  • Once your daughter hits puberty, do take her for a cervical shot.
  • If your daughter complains of itching around her vagina, wash the area with a diluted solution of potassium permanganate. Take a few crystals of KMNO4 and dilute it with lots of water and pour the water on her vaginal area. Or ask her to sit in a tub of this solution. Alternatively, you can use common salt solution too.
  • Lastly, if you notice mucus in her vagina or if you find your daughter constantly scratching around her vagina or anus, take her to the doctor. It might be due to a pinworm infection.

Hope these tips are useful!

10 Essential Items for Diapering your Baby On-The-Go

Travelling with your baby needs a lot of preparation. Diapering your baby while on the move can be quite a tedious task. You need to ensure that you pack your diaper bag with all the necessary items.

Are you worried that you may forget something important? Keep the following checklist handy, and let go of all your packing woes:

1. Disposable diapers
The most important item in your bag is, quite obviously, the diapers! You will be required to change your baby’s nappies every few hours. Carry disposable diapers in sufficient quantities, depending on the duration you will remain out of the house.

2. Disposable bags
Carry separate disposable bags to dump used diapers. These bags will ensure that the soiled diapers do not create any mess or foul smell in your diaper bag.

3. Reusable diapers
If you are on a long trip, and think that reusing diapers is easier than carrying a bulk of disposable ones, then go for reusable diapers. These diapers will help make your bag light.

4. Wipes
Wipes are necessary while diapering your baby. They will keep your hands and your child clean and dry.

5. Sanitizer
A hand sanitizer will help you maintain proper hygiene after diapering your baby. It is a must as you may not get a chance to wash your hands every time you change your baby’s diapers.

6. Cream
Keep a travel-sized tube cream in your bag. You will need it for your baby every time you change the diaper.

7. Air freshener
Travelling with poop smell will be very unpleasant. Use an air freshener so that you and your co-passengers may have a stink-free journey.

8. Napkin
There’s no such thing as too many napkins. You will always require more napkins than you think. You will need one every time you feed the baby or when you need to clean dripping saliva or an accidental spill. Napkins are your best friends, and you’ll find plenty of uses for them.

9. Baby clothes
Always keep an extra pair of baby clothes ready. Spits, spills, or diaper leakages may be severe enough to require a change of clothes, so you had better have some on hand.

10. Bottle
Breastfeeding while travelling will be difficult. Keep your baby’s milk bottle ready, and ensure that you carry warm milk during all your journeys.

Be prepared for anything while you’re travelling with your little one. Carry these items while keeping your bag as light as possible.

For the right tips on pregnancy and early parenting, check the Pampers India website. Pampers also provides expert tips on newborn baby diapers, easing pregnancy and post-pregnancy symptoms too.

The kids are not all right

monkeybar

A few weeks ago, I had attended a birthday party of my daughter’s friend. There they played a game, the age old ‘Passing the parcel’, however, what was different was the way it was played. The child who was caught with the parcel when the music stopped was asked to leave the circle, but with that parcel as the gift, and then a new parcel was introduced. The game continued till every child got a gift. I asked the mother what was wrong with the earlier version, the version we had all grown up with.

She said – “I do not like kids to be disappointed. See, here every child is happy as he or she gets to take a gift home.”

In another instance, I was in the park with my daughter. She was playing lock and key with her friends. Now, one of her friends fell down. Her mother, who was on the other side of the park ran to his son, all confused and upset. She scooped her son in her lap and started inquiring – “Are you hurt? Let me see! Do no cry! Shush, mama is here.”

The child, had a scraped knee, who was perfectly OK till then, started crying earnestly.

I was at a friend’s home for lunch. Her 5-year old daughter refused to eat what was cooked for lunch. My friends felt so guilty that her daughter would go hungry, that she cooked up her favourite pasta immediately. According to her, it was not the first time this had happened.

At the School Sports Day, there are no races, no competition. No first, second or runner ups. Because, everyone is equal, there should be no competition between the kids.

Kids today have a room full of toys and games. Some they ask, some they do not. But, they still get them. Everything in excess is the new mantra of life.

Our parents taught us self-reliance, while we hover around our children and want to protect them at all costs. We like to hold our babies closer to the protection of the nest. We go out of our way and rustle up something when they don’t eat what’s cooked at home for everyone else, because we don’t them to sleep hungry. Instead of letting them play outside, we organize activities for them. We do their homework and their assignments. We even resolve their conflicts for them.

It makes me wonder, what will happen to these kids when they grow up?

Will they get a gift everytime they fail? Will they be able to handle disappointment? A child who has never been denied anything, how will he cope with rejections? There are a growing number of cases when kids run away from home or commit suicide because they are not able to deal with low marks in examinations or when they fail to secure an admission in an institution of their choice.

Will their parents keep them hidden in their bosom all their life? Our mothers never ran after us, a scraped knee was just that. She would ask us to wash it with some water and then forget about it. But, there was no drama that followed. Falling and hurting was a part of daily life for us. We cycled, climbed up trees and jumped from the stairs. Today, kids travel in elevators and escalators (because they might fall down the stairs and get themselves hurt). Earlier, kids walked and cycled. I hardly see kids walking nowadays, unless it’s for a kids’ marathon and they are required to pose for selfies with their cool mommies. I never see kids climbing up the monkey bars, do you?

Will they shy away from competition or be able to survive it? OK, so we can accompany our kids till the college gate and sit in the waiting area while they appear for a job interview. In one-child China, parents have been known to put up tents outside their college kids’ dorms. This is an invisible umbilical cord we are just not ready to cut. And, what happens after that? A child who is never used to losing – how will he survive in the big bad world?

We are raising our kids to be adult babies.

So what should we do?

  • Stop telling our children that they are special all the time. They are not, at least not always. So reserve the praises for the times when they actually deserve.
  • Stop going out of the way to create happiness in their life. The life is a mix of joys and sorrows, and it is for a reason. We have no right to interfere with the nature. So let’s stop pretending that everything is all right when it’s not. Let the kids have their fair share of disappointments at an early age. It’s better to fall at 10, than at 40.
  • Stop giving them things when they don’t require it. We had fewer toys, but did we ever complain? Were we unhappy because of that? No, right. So why are we teaching our kids to be materialistic? Why should they find happiness in toys and games, and not people? We give them iPads, iPhones…we are teaching them it’s all right to speak to the technology, rather than people. Today’s kids have more virtual friends than actual friends.
  • Stop hovering around them. Let them take action and be responsible for it. If they have done a wrong deed, they should take the punishment or the consequences for it. Do not protect them unnecessarily.
  • Let them fall. And, do not cushion their fall. Also, let them get up on their own. Only when they fall, will they get up. Let them learn things on their own.
  • Stop feeling guilty. For things we can’t provide them. We are the parents, not superhumans or Gods. Make kids understand our limitations.

It’s not the kids who are at fault, but us, the parents. Let’s sit with our parents and understand how they raised us – independent and fearless. We can take a leaf or two from  their parenting book. It wouldn’t do us any harm, but might save our kids!

6 annoying habits of moms (including myself!)

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Image: fabmama.nl

We are mothers, and though we might think ourselves way above other species, the truth is we can be damn annoying sometimes. Ask your friends, family …or even husband (if he is daring enough to be completely truthful to your face)..and you will know the truth.

Here are 6 annoying habits of moms, including myself, that we generally come across.

Complaining about her child’s thinness – One of my dear friends always laments the fact that her child is thin. OK, I get it that her child is not pudgy, and there is no chance she would be selected for Johnson’s baby product commercials, but why she needs to say that again and again.

“I give her such nice healthy things to eat. But, she never gains weight like your daughter!”

On another occasion, she remarked “Looks like your daughter has grown taller. She looks thinner, too. But, at least she is better (read thinner) than my daughter!”

Her daughter is tall, healthy and very active. Seriously, I feel like telling her off on such occasions “why you need a fat child?”

Complaining her child doesn’t eat enough – Another classic complaint of most mothers. In the park or in school meetings, you will always meet one or another mother who will complain that her child doesn’t eat properly.

I once saw a mother feeding her 9-month old a porridge made of wheat flour, milk and 1 big apple for breakfast. Now, after 2 hours or so, she brought his lunch consisting of 2 chapattis, dal and subji. The child didn’t want to eat, but the mother force-fed her 1 chapatti. But before she could move onto the second, he puked all the food out.

The mother exclaimed, “See, he doesn’t eat! When I try to make him eat, he vomits!”

The child in question is obese. Need I say further?

Photographing and putting on the Facebook – The new age mom loves her kids, so much so that she wants to show off her kids to all and sundry. And, what better way to do that than clicking umpteen photos of her kids and putting them on the Facebook. So, what if her entire Facebook wall is filled up with her kids swimming, dancing or doing Karate; the more the better. Sometimes I wonder if they ever see their kids outside the camera lens and enjoy the moment.

Being a snob about her child’s school – This is something I have come across a lot. A mother who knows her child goes to an expensive school (or a school in which admission is difficult to get into) first asks you “In which school does your child study?”

You reply, and out of courtesy you end up asking the same question to them.

And, in that one moment their eyes light up, their face develops an expression of superiority and their tone holds certain pride. That is their moment of glory and they won’t hesitate to demonstrate it to you.

Showing off her child – Some mothers behave as if their child has come from the planet Krypton with superhuman abilities.

He talks so glibly. He is going to be a politician. And, you could say that from now, when he is just 2?

She learned to walk at 9 months. What is it going to serve?

She will definitely be a model. She pouts like one! And how is that an accomplishment?

Self pitying – Stay away from these moms! They suck up all the positivity from around their vicinity. These are the moms who have a litany of complaints. Their children wake up so early or sleep so late, are over-active, that she doesn’t get a moment’s breather. We get it you are super busy or super exhausted, but could you also, once in a while, talk about something else please!

It is one thing to love your kids and be proud of them, and totally another (and unnatural) to drag the whole world into this intimate circle. Be a proud mother, not an annoying one!

5 Lessons I Have Learned In 5 Years Of Parenting That Make It All Worth It!

lessons of parenting
When I first held my tiny newborn in my arms, I experienced such an overwhelming rush of emotions that is both overwhelming and yet at the same. As I touched her tiny pink fingers, I resolved to teach her all the fine things of life and to raise her to be a good human being.
5 years later, my daughter has turned into a confident social person. She is a person in her own right and I am proud of her. But, what I am more proud of is the 5 lessons that I have learned in the 5 years of parenting that have changed my life and made me a better person.
1. Live in the present 
Like most people, I worried about tomorrow. What will happen tomorrow? We hoard things and money for tomorrow, and in the process do not enjoy TODAY. But, my daughter lives in the present. She wants her chocolate now, she wants to play today and she wants to open up all her gifts today itself. Even when I tell her she can have an extra hour of play the next day because it’s her holiday, but she won’t listen. Tomorrow is a concept she doesnt understand and believe in. All she has is today, and she wants to make the most of it. That makes me realize, “Why do I fret about tomorrow? Who has seen tomorrow? All I have is today!”
2. Forgive and forget 
The other day, my daughter came back home all upset. On inquiry, I came to know that she had fought with her friend and they said kitta to each other. For those who do not know, kitta in kids’ lingo means ‘we are not talking to each other’. However, the next day, when I took her down to the park to play, she met her friend and they both hugged as if yesterday hadn’t happened. There was no more talk of kitta, and everything was resolved with no sorries, no hard feelings or anyone’s pride or ego getting hurt. If only we can be so flexible and easy going with our own relationships!
3. Do not clutter your life
Like all parents, I like to spoil my daughter. So she has many toys, books and clothes. But, surprise of all surprises, she isn’t bothered with the numbers. She is happy wearing the same red frock that she loves, every day (that is a different story that I don’t let her). She …read more at http://www.worldofmoms.com/blog/5-Lessons-I-Have-Learned-In-5-Years-Of-Parenting-That-Make-It-All-Worth-It/1175/2

There Was a Time I Thought My Baby Would Need Diapers Forever – Until I Tried This Toilet Training Trick

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Image: vimeo

Any kind of weaning is usually a nightmare for mothers. First, there’s weaning from breastfeeding into solid foods, and then there’s weaning from diapers into using the toilet. But nightmare or not, this has to be done. Peeling smelly, messy, poopy diapers off your baby’s bum, day after day, can take away all your energy! Hence, toilet training topped my list of mommy’s to-dos with my daughter. Even though I was so determined about it, I soon started getting an unsettling feeling: would my little one learn, or would she have to be in diapers forever?!

I will be honest with you. I have been luckier than many mothers as far as potty training is concerned. But it was pee training that really got me frazzled. It so happened that as soon as my daughter started sitting up, around the time when she was 7 months old, I bought her a potty with music. I had been told it was best to start early. Initially, she was not comfortable sitting on it. She cried all the time. But then, I started giving her baths on it (sounds weird, I know, but moms will try anything). And guess what, even though the music could not survive the everyday water onslaught, at least my daughter started sitting on it to take a dump.

The next step was making her sit on the big potty with a potty seat. Luckily, this also happened very quickly for me, as she enjoyed sitting on the colourful potty seat. So as soon as she made her ‘potty’ face, I made her sit on it. She soon realized she was supposed to do potty sitting on her seat. She learnt that was the right thing to do. And then one day, when she turned 1 ½ years, she started saying “potty” and then going to sit on the seat! Mission accomplished!

But here we come to weaning her off diapers. This proved to be a mammoth task. In fact, pee training was so difficult for us that there was a time I thought my baby would need diapers forever! I’ll like to share with you the tricks that finally worked for me, so you can speed up the process with your little one:

Trick #1: I made her pee often – every half hour, then every one hour, and then at larger intervals as she grew up and started holding up longer


Also, since my daughter was not on disposable diapers 24/7, that helped. If I missed sticking to these intervals, I knew there would be some cleaning to do. So I tried to tune myself to her system.

Trick #2: I weaned off the diapers one at a time – starting with the evening diaper

I would make her wear three diapers – one in the evening, then changed two in the night. So firstly, I weaned her off the evening diaper. That was easy. It was just like the daytime routine had stretched longer. Little by little, as she became aware of her body and her system, she started signalling to me when she needed to pee. But remember, a child this small is slow to realize her bodily needs. She might leak before she could realize or signal. So there will be misses. As for the two night diapers, more on that in a bit.

Trick #3: We gathered confidence while stepping out with her diaper-less

Once we were visiting a zoo. She was only 2.4 years old at the time. In the middle of our excursion, she said she wanted to pee. I told her, “pee in your diaper.” She refused. Then I told her, “Okay, then hold”. And I forgot all about it. After a few hours, we reached home and I checked her diaper. It was dry. That was when I realized that she was ready to be weaned off diapers when she was awake.

I had my heart lodged in my mouth all the time we were out. What if she peed in a restaurant before so many people? What if I could not find a bathroom on time? But I knew I had to start somewhere, sometime. Initially, I made her wear a diaper when we went out but still took her to the bathroom to get her familiarized with bathrooms other than her own. Whenever we stepped out, I said to her:

“It’s not right to pee in front of others. If you need to pee and we cannot find a bathroom, try to hold it.”

And really, she never leaked in public. Thank God!

Keep on reading at – http://www.worldofmoms.com/blog/there-was-a-time-i-thought-my-baby-would-need-diapers-forever-until-i-tried-this-toilet-training-trick/1104/2

From Experience, I Can Tell You This is the Worst Way to Respond to Your Child’s Tantrum

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My brother was a super tantrum thrower. As a child, I remember whenever his demands were not met, he would spread himself on the ground – no matter where he was, whether it was on the street, playground or dirt track – and kick his legs. For me at 8 years old, it was a funny sight, I am sure my mother would not agree with me.

I had forgotten all about my brother’s weird temper tantrums until I came upon my daughter throwing them. And, let me tell you, it was not funny anymore.

I guess it was payback time for me. Though it didn’t happen much, it was enough to emotionally and physically drain me for life. Without rhyme or reason, she would start crying and refuse to listen. I was having a hard time dealing with these tantrums, needless to say, and it was during this time that I got some hard lessons.

From experience, let me share the WORST ways to deal with your child’s tantrums. Do anything but this when you are tying to restore some peace and normalcy in life!

#1: Giving in to your child’s demands to avoid getting embarrassed in public

When it came to temper tantrums, I had started to notice one thing: the chances of it happening were more when I refused to buy my daughter candy, cookies or flavoured yogurt at the supermarket! It was embarrassing, and hence, I would give in to her demands. We try and do anything to avoid a public scene, right? But, then I realized I was being held to ransom. This could not go on.

Read more at – http://www.worldofmoms.com/blog/from-experience-i-can-tell-you-this-is-the-worst-way-to-respond-to-your-childs-tantrum/1034/2