And then any answer that I give is basically a bad answer. Nothing pleases them. I see a huge look of disappointment and disapproval on their face. It may be a silent ‘Tsk, tsk!” but my over-sensitive ears hear it nonetheless.
And it started right from the day my daughter was born.
“We never made our kids wear diapers.” – Uh, huh! As if you had a choice. There were no diapers back then.
“Why you need to express your milk? Why can’t you breast-feed?” – It takes ages for the actual feeding. And it won’t hurt my little one if she has a couple of feeds from a bottle while I take a much-needed break.
“Cerelac’s so bad. I never gave that to my kids.” – Good for your kids. But I feed my child when I can’t help it.
And then, invariably, I get to hear the stories about how they brought up their numerous kids without any help and still fed them home-made wholesome food at all times?
I admire and respect you for what you did. But I am a different person and definitely not in your league.
Does it happen to you as well? Do they judge you for your selfishness and lack of organizational skills?
If yes, welcome to the group of Parents of Convenience. There is nothing to be ashamed of being one.
We are in a different era; our culture has changed, so have our outlook and needs. We have a lot to accomplish and so little time.
- I juggle career and household work,
- I struggle to be back in shape and be desirable to my husband,
- I rush my kids to various extra-curricular classes,
- I don the caps of wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend at the same time.
- I try hard to please everyone.
So why should someone judge me if my baby loves her bowl of Cerelac and finishes it in a matter of minutes?
Why should someone criticize me if I give a feeder bottle to my baby in the night when she wakes up?
Why am I a bad mommy just because I make my baby watch nursery rhymes, cartoons and Bollywood songs on TV to make her stop crying?
I love my daughter but I love myself too. My life doesn’t and shouldn’t stop because I am a mother. At the end of the day, I want to feel like myself.
I am a parent of convenience. Are you too?