Things people say to you during pregnancy

Pregnancy is a funny time. It evokes all sorts of emotions in people around you. People are suddenly more friendly and caring towards you. They are full of advice which though endearing for most part can be a bit stifling too. And then there are others who feel awkward with this giant bump sticking out of your belly that they end up saying things which they shouldn’t utter even in private.

pregnant advice

Image – pexels

During my pregnancy, there were times when I got a few unexpected advices or requests from family and absolute strangers. They were sometimes shocking and sometimes embarrassing. I have tried to fetch them from the far recesses of my mind and compile them here. Let’s see if I can have a good laugh over them today (well, I was certainly in no mood to appreciate them at that time).

As soon as they heard that I was pregnant, the second thing a few people said after congratulating me, was “I didn’t know you were planning?” They seemed offended. Why? May be I should have carried a board with me saying, “I am having sex to procreate. Any advice please!” 

Oh, this one is very common. Any woman will scare you or bore you with her pregnancy horror stories. Sometimes she need not be a mother herself to recount stories of women she knows. I bore all these with a smile inwardly my patience running thinner every time it happened. There was this friend of my aunt who was such a fat sadistic soul. For 30 minutes, she narrated me stories about long labours and botched up C-sections.

I was facing enough nightmares as such; I didn’t want to know what more was coming.

Another thing that you will be asked often is, “When are you due?” From friends and family, you don’t mind this. But you get asked by absolute strangers too. I felt like screaming this every time, “How does it affect you?” but the nice little girl in me didn’t let it happen. She just smiled and let it pass till the next time it happened all over again.

My 8th month and I had hardly put on any weight. Only a little belly had jutted out. Nobody seeing me from behind could have guessed that I was pregnant. Then I met my neighbour. Looking at my minuscule belly, she asked, “When are you due?” I replied, “Next month.” “Oh, you are so small, I would have never guessed it.” I seethed inwardly. She might not have meant it maliciously, but I wasn’t so forgiving at that moment. Her inadvertent comment also made me anxious. “Was I really so small? Is my baby small too?” I immediately called up my GYN/OB and expressed my concern. Only once she soothed me did I calm down.

Once your tummy starts showing, it’s a tough time fending off constant requests from people who want to feel your baby’s kicks. Yes, funny, isn’t it? I can understand the joy it gives to the mother and father, but what fun does it give to others??? This is my body, give me one good reason why I should let you touch me?

This one takes the cake. So I have saved it for the last. One of my close family members asked me, “When was your last period?” Yes, you read it right the first time. Why? I am not sure till date. I felt like asking her, “May be you’d like to know the date I had intercourse too?” But I chose to stay quiet. Damn!

Sometimes it’s funny and sometimes irritating, but the truth is there’s no escaping it. So be prepared for the unexpected.

If you have a funny tale to recount, do share it here. It will be fun to have a laugh together.

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3 thoughts on “Things people say to you during pregnancy

  1. Pingback: Beautiful, but unexpected pregnancy | A Day in the Life

  2. Lol. Good piece of writing. I really liked the way you have expressed your feelings during pregnancy. I am a working woman and expecting my little one to arrive next month. After reading your piece of art, just thought of sharing my experiences during these last 8 months.

    My mother-in-law is a bit involved with Indian traditional Babas, who claim to provide medicine or can say Totka to convert a girl child to a boy (Lol). I wondered on her education when she gave me that pearl like medicine and asked me to have with certain conditionalities (like wash your hair, take this with butter, in the morning etc. Blaah). Anyways, I said yes to the orders by being a good obedient Indian Bahu, but thrown that in the dustbin right after that (Thankfully me and my hubby live in different city). Some aunties were asking me to wear black thread with a small knife tied in it, in my neck. Some were asking me not to get out from the house after it is dark (And I generally reach home at around 8 pm). And believe me, all those aunties in my family including my mother in law are well educated and working at very senior positions in their respective organizations.

    I use to get irritated at the first. I wondered on our Indian society, where some people claim such nonsense. I first thought of making these aunties understand the lesson on reproductive health which we had learnt in middle school. Can anyone convert a girl fetas to a boy? Can a thing made of iron really protect my child? Disgusting !!

    But above all, my husband has supported me throughout my pregnancy. He has become cook, maid, massager, driver and many more to ease my life. Love between us has increased by the time I have conceived. Life is like this only, where you meet some irritating personalities but there will be some who understand you and stand by you like a rock.

    • Pinky, hats off to you and your hubby by standing by you. During pregnancy, the temptation is too great to give into these so called totkas, as most often we wonder ‘what’s the harm?’. But gradually, these totkas get woven into our social fabric and are difficult to separate the real from the fake. Good luck to you and your husband! And do let me know once the baby arrives. Will be waiting eagerly to hear if the so-called totkas worked their magic. 😉

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