Pregnancy is a funny time. It evokes all sorts of emotions in people around you. People are suddenly more friendly and caring towards you. They are full of advice which though endearing for most part can be a bit stifling too. And then there are others who feel awkward with this giant bump sticking out of your belly that they end up saying things which they shouldn’t utter even in private.

pregnant advice
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During my pregnancy, there were times when I got a few unexpected advices or requests from family and absolute strangers. They were sometimes shocking and sometimes embarrassing. I have tried to fetch them from the far recesses of my mind and compile them here. Let’s see if I can have a good laugh over them today (well, I was certainly in no mood to appreciate them at that time).

As soon as they heard that I was pregnant, the second thing a few people said after congratulating me, was “I didn’t know you were planning?” They seemed offended. Why? May be I should have carried a board with me saying, “I am having sex to procreate. Any advice please!” 

Oh, this one is very common. Any woman will scare you or bore you with her pregnancy horror stories. Sometimes she need not be a mother herself to recount stories of women she knows. I bore all these with a smile inwardly my patience running thinner every time it happened. There was this friend of my aunt who was such a fat sadistic soul. For 30 minutes, she narrated me stories about long labours and botched up C-sections.

I was facing enough nightmares as such; I didn’t want to know what more was coming.

Another thing that you will be asked often is, “When are you due?” From friends and family, you don’t mind this. But you get asked by absolute strangers too. I felt like screaming this every time, “How does it affect you?” but the nice little girl in me didn’t let it happen. She just smiled and let it pass till the next time it happened all over again.

My 8th month and I had hardly put on any weight. Only a little belly had jutted out. Nobody seeing me from behind could have guessed that I was pregnant. Then I met my neighbour. Looking at my minuscule belly, she asked, “When are you due?” I replied, “Next month.” “Oh, you are so small, I would have never guessed it.” I seethed inwardly. She might not have meant it maliciously, but I wasn’t so forgiving at that moment. Her inadvertent comment also made me anxious. “Was I really so small? Is my baby small too?” I immediately called up my GYN/OB and expressed my concern. Only once she soothed me did I calm down.

Once your tummy starts showing, it’s a tough time fending off constant requests from people who want to feel your baby’s kicks. Yes, funny, isn’t it? I can understand the joy it gives to the mother and father, but what fun does it give to others??? This is my body, give me one good reason why I should let you touch me?

This one takes the cake. So I have saved it for the last. One of my close family members asked me, “When was your last period?” Yes, you read it right the first time. Why? I am not sure till date. I felt like asking her, “May be you’d like to know the date I had intercourse too?” But I chose to stay quiet. Damn!

Sometimes it’s funny and sometimes irritating, but the truth is there’s no escaping it. So be prepared for the unexpected.

If you have a funny tale to recount, do share it here. It will be fun to have a laugh together.